Sleep

I remember when I used to get sleep. I could sleep for hours. I went through some serious bouts of insomnia during both high school and collage. But for years after I slept great. Now I'm back to not sleeping. And I've started to dream. I never used to remember my dreams. Oh, maybe the occasional ones, but they were few and far between. But now it seems like everytime I close my eyes my mind starts up with the dream crap. Most of them are not nice. I keep dying in my dreams. Either that or they're about people I don't see anymore. I've had my fair share about the Demon and a few other past relationships. But even when these are nice (or naughty) dreams, when I wake up alone they suck! Now I'm not sure if I can't sleep or if I'm afraid to in case I dream. I don't like sleeping pills or else I'd just medicate myself. But what's the alternative? Spending whole days being tired and then still not sleeping? The last time I had a good night sleep was the last time I made love to the demon. Six months ago. I gotta get some sleep soon. Doesn't lack of sleep cause hallucinations? Maybe it's all been a dream? If so it's just another nightmare. Like most of my life....