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Hello Hello Hello is there anybody in there just nod if you can hear me is there anyone home..

Just Me

seems like I always end up screwing things up.. lost one of my best friends.. someone I love.. and she was gone for 9 years... and then she came back. and after only 11 months I screwed up again and now it looks like she's leaving me again... why can't I just get it right sometimes... been rough lately.. Mom died in March.. Wife and I are in counseling to try to hold our marriage together... my arthritis and psoriasis keep spreading and getting worse... work has become stressful... i'm in debt to the point of drowning.. and my car is falling apart... starting to think maybe fighting on after my daughter died was a waste of time...

Reunited.. and it Feel so Good

So it's been weird.. the last few months it seems like I'm talking to a lot of friends who I thought were gone from my Life.. the Demon is back.. Isis is back... have actually gotten to visit with KellsBells... although Heaven has stopped talking to me again... she has a new boy friend and so I guess I'm on the outs... but got a phone call from CoffeeGod, who I need to call back... is just strange to be hearing from them all again.. strange and wonderful... and I hope it continues...

Lost

So my old laptop died.. the hard drive went kaplooie.. and with it we lost all of our pictures of Prodigy and also all of our Passwords and Tax info.... s much stuff gone. My Cuz Gundamschlong is trying to recover anything he can. But in the meantime I'm stuck trying to remember all my passwords for sites. This sucks so bad. We bought a new laptop, and now have to get used to Windows *, which sucks so far. But I couldn't find anything being sold with Windows 7. Bleh..

A Peek at Collecting

I'm a collector. I collect comics books and also non-sports cards. I've been collecting since 1985. If there is one problem with collecting, it's when as a collector you start to realize that there are certain items that are part of something you collect that you will never own. Maybe it's because of how rare the items is, or possibly because of the price the item commands. I've been fairly lucky, I started with comics back before the big boom in the industry. When I started I managed to buy some very old golden age books when the price of them was still in manageable range. Several items in my collection are measure in worth in the 5 number range, and yes that's before the decimal point. But of the few I'm missing I realize now that unless I want to try and buy totally ruined copies I will never own them. No, I don't buy for condition. I buy to read the issues. But I still want to make sure I have the full story and be able to see the whole cover. I run into the same problem with my non-sport cards. Some sets have introduced cards that are so rare that the odds of getting one are astronomical, and the price of buying one on the aftermarket is outrageous. So I'm stuck knowing that my set will always be incomplete. Which as a collector drives me nuts. Want an example? In 2006 Artbox entertainment released a set of cards based on the old Frankenstein movie. There were 72 cards in the main set. There was also a chase set of 9 glow in the dark cards randomly inserted in packs. There was also 3 glow in the dark cards that could be found inserted in the cellophane of some of the boxes. Then there were flim cell cards, cards containing pieces of the original movie film. There were 9 different ones, and they only made 75 of each of them. When I first started getting them they could be found on E-Bay at about $20-30 apiece. But as folks began to realize how rare they really were the price went up and now they command maybe $75-150 apiece. I have 7 of the . But that's not all. There were also Prop cards released. They contain a piece of wiring from the original Frankenstein movie set. Only 50 of these were made and one is on E-Bay right now for $499.00. Lastly, oh yes we're not done, a cut signature card contain Boris Karloff's signature was part of the set. Only 3 were made and the last time one showed up for sale it went for $5,000.00. Yes. So that's the downfall of collecting. Companies making items so rare that no regular collector can afford them. Hmmm... I wonder what my credit card limit is....

Another Night

So sitting at work, been lazy tonight. Was hoping to get to talk to the Demon on Facebook, but no luck. Sometimes it worries me when she doesn't come on, guess part of me still expects her to leave my life again. But so far she's stayed and I'll take that for as long as I can get it. My back hurts tonight, think I've just been sitting too long. Am tired too. Working 8 hours, then home to watch Prodigal till 8Am, then maybe 4 hours of sleep. It takes a toll after a while. But am trying to let Babushka get as much sleep as I can give her. Been seeing a shrink for depression. He gave me stuff to do during our week break but I haven't done it. Part of it is just being lazy, part of it is not wanting to. Just been feeling more and more down as time goes on. Anyways. Will post again soon I hope. Peace.

Still Chugging Along

What a wild ride. Prodigal is home, and sleep is now a thing of the past. I took some time off work to help get him settled in, but I go back the end of this week. Not sure how much worse it's going to be once I am working. I get little enough sleep now. Wife is still off work till probably mid to late October. When she goes back we're probably going to need to have folks come over to watch him just so we can get any sleep at all. Due to our schedules we aren't planning on using a day care, also because we can't afford the damn places. The baby shower went off fantastic. Got to see a lot of friends and family and everyone had a good time. Lil sis has just found a new apartment down in Floridia. Her Mom came home from a trip and randomly told her and her hubby that she was selling the house they were living in. So they had to scramble to find somewhere to live which was uber stressful for them. Heaven seems to be not talking to me again, although I don't know why. She recently got divorced and has been dating someone new, not sure if that has anything to do with it. Been talking to the Demon, ALOT. But only over the comp. She is seeing a therapist to deal with her issues, which is perhaps the best news about her in a long time. Maybe they can help her with her self-destructive tendencies. It amazes me how much I still love her after all the time and pain and I want her to be happy, which won't happen till she deals with her own demons. Kells Bells is MIA, I saw her at the Shower and she was saying things are rough between her and her hubby, but since then I haven't been able to get in touch with her so I don't know the full story. I'm very worried about her, she's been through hell in her life and could use some sunshine. Ogre just ended his 4 year relationship. I saw it coming 4 years ago, the woman he was with just didn't match up to him at all. So he's back with his Mom which is making him depressed because at his age you really shouldn't be living with your parent. But he has a good job and if he keeps working at it he should be able to find a place for himself soon. Pattycakes just lost her son, in the same way we lost our daughter last year. I've been doing my best to be there for her and talk with her, but it brings back so many memories. Other than that everyone else is doing good. I do the overnights with little Prodigal. I'm starting therapy myself to deal with depression, still missing my daughter so badly and it's starting to effect my functioning on a day to day basis. Sometimes it puts a strain on me and Babushka. But I am looking forward to Halloween.

Flying by the Seat

So life rushes on. My Son (Prodigal) is now over a month old. He's still in the Hospital, where he's getting closer and closer to coming home. The house is of course no where near ready. And I've managed to pull a muscle in my side so that makes the work go even slower. We just don't have a lot of room in our home, so fitting in a child is causing us to throw out a lot and box up even more. I have the garage somewhat cleaned, thanks to help from Babushka, KellsBells and WorriedSis. Now I get to box stuff upstairs up and fill the garage again. Speaking of friends, so KellsBells is doing so-so. He health after years of chemical abuse continues to slide. For one of the more beautiful women I know it amazes me how bad she's doing physically. Hate seeing her go through it all. Lil Sis and her Hubby are still happy in Old Folks Florida. They've actually been appearing in local movies, two flicks about Zombies. One was called Just Another Day, and the new one is And Tomorrow Comes. Very happy for them, even though I hate how far away she is. She gets mad at me because I haven't come to visit her. But I told her once the main reason and she couldn't handle it. We're planning the Baby Shower for early September. Should be a blast. Lots of friends and family. Babushka wants me to stay for it, which should be interesting. The only prob is if the Prodigal comes home too soon from the hospital. Not sure what we do then. Can't expose him to that many people, which could mean I'd be at the Shower without Babushka. Cringe. Been talking almost ever day to the Demon. I'm so happy she's back in my life. For all the pain that came from loosing her, it amazes me how much I still Love her and need her in my life. She is doing so-so in her life, but she has a Son who is her world, and that makes me happy. Hope this time she stays around, maybe we can finally work past the reasons she always left by just staying in contact as friends. We may never get to see each other face to face (her Baby-Dad is a jealous person and doesn't even know we talk online.) but I'll even take just conversations on the computer for the rest of my life if that's all I can get. So facebook takes up a lot of my time now. It's become my easy way to keep in touch with people. Just leave quick posts or comments and viola! no need to talk in person. Yea, sometimes I hate it. I don't get to visit people anymore, and they don't realize how long it's been, because we talk on facebook. But, it's still better than loosing them, and for many who have moved away it's better than racking up a phone bill. Work trudges along. They still have me on this ridiculous 6pm to 2am shift. Would love to get back to third shift, but I think someone will have to retire or die before that happens. Then again, thanks to this shift we won't need a babysitter or daycare. There's always someone home at our house. So even after I go back to work (am taking 3 weeks off when Prodigal gets home) we should be covered good. Also, have family and friends who will cover if we need them too. WorriedSis is just 5 minutes away, along with my niece Sunshinny. My Folks are even closer than that. Do-Nut girl can watch him some nights when she gets off work. Babushka's folks are both retired. There is also Columbia available. So lots of alternatives. But for now just concentrating on getting the house ready, spending time at the hospital with Prodigal and Babushka, and talking to the Demon when I can. Next week is our daughter's Birthday. This is going to be a hard day. Not sure how we are going to get through it. I took the day off, but not sure if we're going to go somewhere or just shut down. Will wait and see. Peace.

Birth

I'm a Dad.... I have a Son... July 15th 2013 8:11 am... and the Chaos wind keeps blowing on and on and on and on and on........

Time Flies

Wow.. so much happening so fast. Babushka is home on bedrest. We lived at the Hospital for 5 weeks. At this point the Baby has a 85% chance of survival. I'm actually feeling hopeful. We have either Quad L or MommaRita staying with her when I'm at work. So if anything happens they can get her to hospital, and since I work only 10 minutes from the hospital I can be there when they get there. Of course the house is nowhere near ready for a baby, but we'll deal when we can. I've been talking to the Demon again, a lot actually. We're friends on facebook and I gotta say it's great catching up with her and having her in my life again. I've also been talking with Sharebear (aka. Purple Pyramid or Isis) on facebook as well. That is still touch and go, but is nice to hear from her once in a while. Haven't seen K&B Toystore for a while, and probably won't for a bit, but they know I love them and I have no fears of loosing touch. Heaven has a new beau, now that she is divorced, and her time is taken up with him. Mr. Bri got married and is uber-happy. My Bro was at the wedding and was nice enough to find time to visit hospital so I could see him and family. Lil Sis is doing good down in Old Folks Florida. Hmmm.. probably missing lots of people, but thing is other than occasional posts on facebook I haven't seen many f the friends circle in a while. Life just got busy, and time keeps flying away so fast.