Thursday, September 29, 2005

Cd's in the morning

I hate morning radio. All the stations seem to have the same crap on. A small group of idiots who think they're so funny. They tell stupid jokes and tell stupid stories and make dumb crank calls. All I want to hear while I'm driving in the morning is music to wake up too. Why the hell do all these station think that anyone wants to listen to a group of idiots prattle on and on about nothing? The they all do the same traffic reports every 5 min. If I didn't have my CD's I'd go nuts!

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

Finding lost friends

I have recently descovered that one of my fellow bloggers who I thought gone has just switched spaces. Madame X, who I have had such fun reading vanished after someone found her blog who wasn't supposed to. But she is back in buisness and I'm very glad to have her back.

Also Gama, our hurricane threated poet has returned as well, and I hope to ear an account of his escapdes soon, but I am happy he's alright. I think this latest poem may be the most anticipated on he's ever wrote, because it means he's back.

Sadly my dear friend Brenenenena left for Denver today. I will miss her hugs, even though they wern't all that frequent. I hope her journey goes well and that the Mile High holds the key to her and her beau's happiness. I am doing my best to tell myself that her departure is only from CT and not from my life, but I have lost many friend to distance and I am scared.

Hope everyone's doing great and I'l post again soon, I'm staying at my Lil Sis's while she's in Florida so will hopefully have plenty of time to keep up with the blog.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Cliff Diving Death (my memories and stuff)

So My Bro, his Girl Payteeee, his littler bro Jiminey, our friend Birdpoet, and myself decide to go cliff diving. Theres a place not too far away where theres three differant drops, about 25ft-35ft- and 45ft. You have to walk through some state owned propety to get there, and if your caught your chucked out. But that didn't stop us, ahh to be younger again. We reached the cliffs about noon and spent most of the day jumping down and then climbing back up to do it again. All except Jiminey that is. He'd run right up to the edge and stop dead. Over and over again. My Bro threatened to chuck him over at one point, but it was just a joke. He's too laid back to actually go through with it. I still remember my first jump. Wait, no thats a lie. I remember runnign to the edgs, and I remember being io the water. Acording to My Bro I yelled "SH*T" all the way down. After the first one I was fine though, although I will admit I don't relish the feeling of my stomach staying behind me as I fall. (Although I have done cliff diving, bungee swings, and free fall, I don't like the feeling and do them more to prove to myself that I can than because I enjoy it. And once I do prove it to myself I ususally don't bother to do it again.) After about 3 hours we were all tired and ready to go. It took more out of you to climb that damn rockside than anything else. Yeah I was slimmer then, but still overwieght to a degree. So we started to pack up, but Jiminey still hadn't managed to jump. So he came up to me and said if I jumped one more time we could go together. At first I told him I was too tired and didn't want to, but he whined about coming all the way out here and not having the balls to jump and I felt bad for him. So kind of aggrivated I turned to the cliff and stepped off.
Yeah, not jumped but stepped.
Theres a reason it's called cliff jumping. Thats because you have to go out far enough to avoid the rocks at the bottom of the cliff where it goes under water.
Jiminey didn't jump, my Bro and Payteee ran to the edge next to him and watched me fall. I got told later that Payteee said as I fell "he's going to die!". For whatever reason I hit the water feet first but with them angled out away from me, instead of the jacknife plunge I usually do. Even though, it was close. I felt the rocks scrape across my back as I hit the water. All they saw from up top was the splash and then red in the water.
Then about a few seconds later, just long enough for them to believe I was dead, I popped up a couple feet away. My back was scraped to pieces, but that was all that was wrong. Bro jumped in, landing a little away from me, and helped me back up the rock. My back was bleeding and we wraped my shirt around it to make it stop. Paytee said she didn't breathe till I got back up top and she could hug me and see that I was mostly Ok. Jiminey swore he was NEVER going to go diving again as long as he lived. To be honest, I never have again either.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Sunday at the fair

So I'm taking Sunday off to go to the Durham Fair, the largest state fair in CT. (Yeah, I'm not far from the Big E in Mass, but one of my ex's lives near it so I don't go.). I have next to no money, but will find a way to pay for myself, Babushka, and possibly Kells Bells and her son. Why? For the food! Thats right, to hell with rides and games and attractions, I go for the food. From fries in a box to cotton candy to deep fried mushrooms to homemade donughts to buffalo burgers to frozen bananas to anything I can buy. Last year I went with Isis and she wouldn't let me get a deep fried Twinkie, so I'm getting one this year (she was afraid I'd have a heart attack on the spot, and I might but it'll be worth it!). I'll spend all day walking around, play the occsasional game (I get into trouble at the games, like when I found out I had a long enough reach to hold the dart by the end and just lean in and pop a whole bunch of balloons without letting go), and eat enough to clog my arteries solid. After the fair I'm going to start a diet, wich may sound counter-productive, but this fair only comes once a year so my body will just have to deal. I'm just hoping I have some nice weather for the day. So cross your fingers for me and I hope you all have as good a weekend as I'm planning on.

As an add on to this post thought I'd say that Kells and her son arn't going with us. She has to go out of state due to her Dad having surgery. BM and his family went today so I guess I won't be bumping inot them like I did last year either. But I'll still love the fair I'm sure.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Hurricane pt.2

I was fortunate that all of those who I knew got out of the path of Katrina. But now we have Rita on the way and it seems to be heading right at Houston TX, home of our very own poet Gama. On his last post he said he was evacuating the city, I have my fingers crossed that he gets out in time. I also know Alexk lives in TX, although I'm not sure how close to the storm she is. Of course she might be the type to drive into the hurricane and try and shoot it down, but I'm hoping for once that syhe does the safe thing. Also Ari is in Dallas, which I hope is far enough away from the destruction to be safe, although even that might not be far enough so she should batten down the hatches and keep her head down. I'm not the praying type, but if you are please send a quick one out for those in the path of the storm. My heart is with them all, both those I know and those I don't. I hope to hear updates from them all soon and hope they and thier loved ones get through it all safe and sound.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Confused political correct censorship

WARNING: If you are easily offended by certain words or thoughts please be careful reading this post. I'm not advocating any of these words or the small minded people who use them, I'm just pointing out an oddity on the radio.

Ok, heres one that has me confused. This afternoon I was listening to the radio and the song "Holiday" By Green Day came on. During the song they allowed the palying of the words Sieg Heil on air in the line "Sieg Heil to the Presidents yes men". I found this odd because I remember a few months ago listening to a Howard Stern broadcast (Not something I normally listen too) and they discussed how the FCC doesn't like any referances to Nazi's or Naziism on the airwaves. They consider any lines that can be considered anti-semantic offensive (which I agree). I started to wonder if maybe they've changed that rule. Then a few moments later in the song they garbled (The radios way of bleeping out an offensive word without a loud bleep) the word fag in the line "Shoot all the Fags who don't agree". Now I know that this is considered an offensive word (except to my friend who is a homosexual, he actually calls himself "the Fag".). I was just wondering why they garbled that one but let Sieg Heil through? Then to make things worse a few songs later they played the full version of "Money For Nothing" by Dire Starights and they allowed the playing of the line "The little Faggot, He's a millionaire." unaltered. Why is Faggot allowed but not Fag? I think somone is getting thier censorship confused here. Does any one else have any reason for this odd selection of wording that is either allowed or dis-allowed on radio?

Tuesday, September 20, 2005


So Blogger is giving me trouble comkenting or posting (probably won't let me post this). Hope it's just a quick thing that they're working on. I get so little time these days to come on and work on my blog I hate when I do so and run into problems. I hope everyone's doing great and I'll comment when it lets me. Peace.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Tagged type thingy

7 Things I Plan To Do Before I Die
1. Go swimming in Loch Ness
2. Tell my littls Sis I told her so. (private joke)
3. Visit my Bro in Oregon
4. Lose some wieght
5. Let go of the Demon
6. Win the Lotto
7. See everyone in my life happy at the same time

7 Things I Cannot Do
1. Yoga
2. Hold my temper if I see a man hitting a woman
3. Save money
4. Sleep
5. Let go of the Demon
6. Give up on friends
7. Not order cheese enchiladas at a mexican restaurant

7 Things That Attract me to the opposite
1. Big boobs
2. Bigger boobs
3. Smile
4. Laugh
5. Ticklish
6. sense of humor
7. even bigger boobs

7 Things I Say Most
1. Smile
2. Darlin
3. No prob
4. I love you
5. Don't worry
6. Harsh
7. I hope they get gonorreah and rot from the a** out.

7 Celebrity Crushes
1. Jennifer Tilly
2. Cathrine Zeta Jones
3. actually thats about it, I can't even name a lot of actresses much less ones I find attractive. sorry.

I'm not gonna tag anyone with this, I think everyone I know has already been named by someone else. Don't take some of my answers too seriously, if you do you've missed the whole point of the fun in these tags.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Reality by Phone

So after almost 2 years of little to no contact from my friend Heaven I got an invite to her son's B-day party in the mail. I figured maybe she was trying to bridge the long gap between us. But the party is on a weekend when I won't be in state. So on the invite it says to call with regrets. So I called.
3 min. Thats how long the call lasted. Thats how long it took me to realize that whatever used to be between us is gone. I told her I missed her, no reply. I told her I couldn't make it, she said thats fine. I told her I loved my friend, no reply. I told her maybe we could get together some other time, no reply. Then her son started crapping without a diaper on and she had to go. There was just nothing there, it was like I didn't even know her. Maybe after 2 years I don't. I hate losing people. I hate losing friends. I hate losing someone I loved. But maybe if I get hit on the head with something enough even I get the picture. I will miss her, and will charish the memories of our times together. But I think I won't be e-mailing her anymore. That makes me sad.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Famous (and not so famous) Movie Quotes

Ok, see how many of these movies you can name. Some are idiot proof obvious, and others are a wee bit tougher. But they are all quotes that make me think of the movies they come from the moment I hear them:

I am your father Luke

We're not in Kansas anymore

Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn

They're coming for you Barbra

Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

You're gonna need a bigger boat

Wait, take that, reverse it, thank you.

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die.

This is my boomstick!

Some men call me....Tim

You're named after the dog?

My precious

I take my coffee black, like my men.

Evil will always win because good is dumb.

I don't have time to bleed.

2 men enter, 1 man leaves.

Mongo just pawn in game of life.

Stop blowing holes in my ship!

You shouldn't shoot me. My gradmother shot me once. Once.

and lastly:
This is egg salad. It's loaded with cholesterol, the wife won't even let me touch it. Hardly seems to matter now cause chances are we're already dead. Amazing is gone, there's no use waiting for the calvery becasue as of this moment the calvery is us. This is our fight wether we like it or not, just we few. We're not your classic super-heroes, we're not the favorites, we're the other guys, we're the guys nobody bets on.......
we're all in over our heads and we know it. But if we take on this fight those of us who survive it will forvever after show our scars with pride and say That's right! I was there! I fought the good fight! So what do you say? Do we all gather together and go kick some Cassanova butt? Or do I eat this sandwich?

If I get good feedback from this maybe I'll do it again someday.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Life's lost pleasures

Things change as you age. Life moves fast and sometimes we lose some of those little pleasures along the path. I realized recently that one of life's little pleasures I once enjoyed has seemed to have vanished from my life.
Don't get me wrong it's not like flirting was a huge part of my life. I've been described as looking like Chewbacca after a shaving accident, and there are only so many women in the world who will flirt with an overwieght Grizzley Adams. Yet there have been a few and I miss the playful sexy banter we shared.
The first I can remember was Eggy. It was in high school. She was the Demon older sister (I met Eggy first, I wouldn't meet the Demon for another year or so). It took someone else to point out to me she was flriting with me. The leaning on me when we walked and talked, the constant referance she made to her boobs, the sitting on my lap at lunch. Guess I was nieve but I just didn't even think anything of it. Of course it all stopped when she finnaly got a boyfriend but it was nice while it lasted.
Next came Isis in collage. Oddly we didn't flirt with each other till after we broke up. But up until she recently got back together with her Ex- hubby we would tease each other when ever we talked. From dicussions of our sex life back when to her jokingly giving me lap dances to me giving her back massages, we had fun trying to get the other started.
Of course there was the Demon. She was a natural flirt and over the years we both got our licks in. From asking me if I needed a "Hand" when getting dressed, to her walking out of changing rooms with langerie on, and all the other little things we would do. Sometimes I think she was my favorite to flirt with just because she never gave the impression that it had to stop with flirting no matter where we were. Well, until she would walk out of my life again, and again, and again.....
There was also Heaven. She was interesting because she would sometimes seem so shy yet would come out with such flirtatious ideas, like offering to help wash my car braless in a white shirt or wanting me to paint her chest with latex for her goth night out. Even before anything happened between us she would flirt with me like trying to get me to wash her back while she was in the bath. Sometimes she would blush while saying stuff, but she never balked at the oprotunities. That lasted even after she was married, but stopped once she found she was pregnant.
Kells Bells would also occasionally Flirt with me, but that was always rare. She once told me I was her confidant and I have the feeling she felt odd about flirting with the person she told all her troubles and dreams to. But she still would once in a while.
So now at the age of 32 I realized I have no one left to flirt with. Even in just a friendly way. I love Babushka, but she is too innocent to be able to flirt, it just dosen't work well if the person tyring to be sexy is giggling. I get to watch others flirt but none for me. It's kind of sad. But I guess thats life. I'm sure I'll lose other charished aspects of my life as I go along. I've given up my long hair, I've lost the flirting, and I've started to lose interest in collecting things like I once did. I used to joke about how I never changed, but time takes a toll on us all. Guess I might not be the rock I once thought myself to be. That idea makes me sad.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Mistaken Ax's (my memories and stuff)

Ok, the only person who had an opinion on my next post was JadedPrimaDonna, so I guess I go with a story that makes me seem like a bit of a psycho. In my defense all I can say was I was young and drunk at the time.
Oh, I should introduce the players in this little drama:
Paladin- That was my nickname back then and I'll use it for this story
Ja- His dad was Jamacian, his mom African. They took a Jamacan name and an African one and put them together in a name no one could pronounce, so we just called him Ja.
Genetic Freak- My little lesbian friend who started having to have her bras custom made at the age of 15.
Minnie- One half of M&M. She was a little giggly girl, normally.
Mickey- The other half of M&M. A nice guy who unfortuantley ended up on the wrong end of this misunderstanding.
Dwayne- This was his real name. Wayne with a D put in. We never called him it. Instead we took any W or D name and just added the other letter in.
Meesha- The first girl who ever saw anything worth dating in me. She was a manic depressive who gave me my first taste of love.

Ok, we were all between 13-15 at the time. We were spending the night at Minnies house. Her parents were rich folks (her dad a retired fireman who had been injured on the job, her mom a lawyer) who would take off for the weekend so we'd all gather at her house and drink from her dad's liquor supply. We spent many weekends drunk there. This one was no differant, well until late that night.
Most of us were crashing that night downsatirs. Meesha, Genetic Freak and I on the pull out couch, Dwonald on the floor, and Ja on the loveseat. M&M were upstairs in her room. What I didn't know was that Mickey had bought her a diamond promise ring that day and decided to give it to her that night. She was so touched ( and tipsey) that she started to cry after he put it on. She also made the tactical error of deciding to come wake us up to show us while she was still crying hard. In fact when she woke me she was sobbing to hard to talk, a bad move when dealing with someone who has a tendecy to be a little overprotective of his friends.

In the dark I didn't see her trying to show me the ring, and the only thing she managed to say was "Paladin...I...Mickey...." between sobs. I woke everyone else and told them to see to her. I meanwhile, grabbed the fireman ax her dad kept above the fireplace and made my way upstairs. I couldn't figure out what Mickey had done to her to make her cry so, but I figured whatever it was was bad and it pissed me off. So ascending the stairs I slammed open the door to her room, drunk and bradishing an ax. I yelled "What the hell did you do to her!" as I stood in the door. Mickey just about sh*t himself. He shot out of the bed, not knowing what was up but with the precense of mind to get the hell away from me quick. He opened her sliding door which lead out to her balcony. The balcony was next to the lower half of the roof, which Mickey proceeded too jump across to. I wasn't done talking to him, I had no intentions of hurting him I just wanted to scare the crap out of him and find out what happened. So I followed him out onto the balcony and, while not as agile as he was, managed to clamber onto the roof.

Downstairs they had calmed Minnie down enough to find out what was up. Ja then realized I had taken her dads ax and had a good idea what my drunken reaction would be to her tears. Leaving the others he draged Dwilliam upstairs after me. When they reached there it took them but a moment to figure out we had gone to the roof. Running out on the balcony themselves they found me stalking Mickey across the roof brandishing the ax. Back downstairs the girls heard a commotion from outside and went out to investigate. They stood on the lawn and watched the drama on the roof. Ja had jumped to the rooftop, but Dwavid had slipped on his attempt and was now hanging from the drainpipe. Ja was trying to help him up while yelling at me to stop. Mickey was begging me to not hurt him, although he still didn't know why I was so pissed. The girls were yelling form below. I still don't know why none of the neighbors called the cops.
Finally Meesha yelled "Paladin I need you, help me!". I stoped imediatly and started to climb down from the roof to get to her. Always was a sucker for a woman in distress. She knew I would come if I thought she was in trouble. So with me trying to figure a way down Ja was able to pull Dwominick up and get both of them and Mickey back into the house.

When I finally got down the girls explained to me what had happened. I felt like such a horses a**. I must have appologized to Mickey for the rest of that year, at least up until everything fell apart. Minnie was mad at first but then decided it was nice knowing all she had to do was call me and I'd run to her aid. Mickey turned the whole thing into a joke, saying he was never giving her another present while I was around.

The last time I ever heard anything from M&M they were living in Alambama and were getting married. They called me after he proposed to her, close to 13 years after the sh*t hit the fan and we all lost touch, just to tell me. The last thing Mickey ever said to me was that even though it had been years and in another state he still looked over his sholder after giving her the ring to make sure nobody was coming after him with an ax. The last thing Minnie ever said was if he ever pissed her off she'd give me a call.

That was 5 years ago, and since I haven't heard from them I will assume they're doing just fine. But I still have an ax in my garage just in case....

Sunday, September 04, 2005

Happy Labor Day

Labor Day
Schmabor Day
What a dumb day
To hire some jerk
Then send him away
To celebrate work
By playing all day
-Garfield (Jon Davis)

Hope everyone's having a great Labor day weekend. Sit back, BBQ and enjoy yourselves.

I was going to write a longer post, maybe another of my memories series, but I couldn't decide which one to write (Either one about the effects of beans on a boys night in, another funny sexual one, or one of me acting like a psycho back in the day. Any preferances?) and anyways I ran out of time tonight. So I'll stick with just a hello and a Happy Labor Day and leave the rest for later.

Oh, and if Midget reads this, I need you help on remembering something, drop me a line through the link on my profile page (My hotmail account is giving me trouble again, I can't get in to get your e-mail address) and let me know when I can call you and you'll actually be home. Sorry about last Sunday, but as I told Amazonia it wasn't my back that kept me out but my nephews (they needed to be babysat, and while I love ya man, they come first.). As for you bringing the wimmin, your not the only one in your house with a jealous bone, Amazonia would step on you for bringing women in and thats a fight I don't need to see.

Friday, September 02, 2005


Just wanted to come on a really quickly wish my little Babuska a Happy Birthday. She turns 24 today... ah for the days when I was 24. We went to the National Maritime Aquarium yesterday to celebrate and I'm going to take her out to dinner tonight. So Happy B-day Babushka. I love you.